Manipulation Techniques in communication
In the minds of most of us, the word manipulation often causes negative emotions.
Many might say: manipulation in communication is deception, lies, submission of knowingly false information.
But this concept is much broader. Let’s try to understand: is it good or bad?
That there is manipulation in communication?
This is the impact of technology on the unconscious part of the human psyche for the purpose of obtaining the benefits of achieving the goal. We can say that it is the desire of the manipulator to control another person (thoughts, actions), without his knowledge.
Manipulation techniques used in communication
Here is a rough classification:
manipulation in business (interaction partners for the purpose of entering into the contract)
manipulation in the team
manipulation in the family (whether spouses or relatives),
manipulation in education («parent-child»),
manipulation in the media (imposing opinions through Newspapers, television),
manipulation in public life (politics).
Every once in his life manipulated in dealing with people, with the aim of obtaining some benefit, whether it be parents, lover, colleagues or friends. People in communicating with people sticking to its specific purpose (not always selfish).
Will give you some examples and techniques of manipulation.
Try to imagine yourself a man (successfully?). You sit in a cafe with a girl, you take care and lead a conversation with her about life and love. And here’s to you lovely teenage girl (or at least pretty grandma) with a bouquet of flowers and offers you to purchase them.
And this is called manipulation. Why?
But because there is a hidden expectation that you will be embarrassed not to buy flowers for this girl in front of your companion. In this case it is an example of manipulation on the human needs to look good in the eyes of the object of sighs.
Thus, the difference between manipulation and other means of influence is that during manipulation, in addition to explicit and public motive, have an ulterior motive, calculation, and implications.
An example of manipulation in trade.
In the store the buyer chooses the goods, hesitantly looking at the cheaper, more expensive things. In General, is determined by the buyer. And then there is the seller who «helps » choose a product:
— This model better, but it is perhaps a little expensive for you.
For the Buyer:
— that’s the one I’ll take.
On the external level, the seller stated true facts: high quality and low financial capacity of the buyer. The hidden meaning of this manipulation is based on the desire of the buyer while the seller (and thus, to some extent ourselves) to look respectable.
The buyer took an expensive thing, treat your self-esteem and wiping (as it seems) nose to the seller.
Everywhere you look, manipulation.
But, unfortunately, so we «programmed» that most often only remembers negative experiences, and positive and we forget!
By manipulating the person we give something in return.
Surely you ever on the street people came with a “gift” from the company. Very cheerful, beginning with the words “Hello! “they solemnly declare that in honor of the 500th anniversary of their generous company you get free lovely set here in this bag, with the bag. And handed it to you!
Another few seconds of optimism and charm and you’re starting to believe in this miracle.
But it turns out that in order for you to finally take ownership of all the rich contents of this bag, needed a mere trifle. Pay just one thing from this wealth.
Some pathetic (compared with the contents of) a few hundred rubles. And here, too, the manipulation!
Manipulation — is more of a system of games, it — a lifestyle.
One thing a single game, which purpose is to avoid the predicament; and another thing — the script of life, which governs the whole system of interaction with the world.
Manipulator-a man who has a certain way of thinking, an established worldview prevailing goal. Nothing wrong with the ability and desire to manipulate others not, provided that:
You fully understand the nature of the manipulation
You formed the purpose to which you go
You do not cause another person harm
If the manipulation is carried out consciously, with a clear understanding of their goals, then no harm in it, at least for the manipulator.
Very useful social skill, given that the entire society they built and did their encourages.
Let us return to the question that stood at the beginning of our article — is it good or bad.
We can safely say that talking about manipulation minus most. Because, in fact, to manipulate, to play on other people’s weaknesses and fears. Because manipulation is the quickest way to achieve results in interaction with people.
It is much easier to play on the strings of someone’s soul and complexes than work on the relationship and scenarios in his life. Because it involves primarily working on themselves, their relationships, their actions and behaviour. Not many people need.
The manipulator, in fact provides a quick result through the minimum cost, taking responsibility for what is happening. (And who from such refuse?) He is happy to justify himself and his actions, said that the object manipulation wanted and what I wanted, and got.
The manipulator is essentially a “Freeloader” who is not ready to work on a relationship, their approaches, their attitudes and their way of life. He does as best he can, keeping his comfort zone.
Manipulation of the minds of others always lead to a deadlock, because if one party manipulates, and the other is conducted in such an attitude, this format of relations in any case does not lead to development, which means that they are doomed to fail.
There is another aspect of this approach is the manipulator itself is the first potential victim of another manipulator.
About the most oblivious, but like attracts like. Object manipulation in one situation, often in another behavior itself. So it’s a mutual choice and responsibility lies with both parties.
The game is a mutual give-away always leads to loss.
A real tool for developing relationships, developing the person and increase the level of communication is finding the true motivation of the other person, finding common points of interest and to develop a mutually acceptable and interesting for both parties in the relationship model and based on this scenario.
It’s always work, but it involves courage and out of the comfort zone.